Changing habits is really just a correction of the course so that you implement more structure and clear expectations for your children. Essentially, you create boundaries within the family unit.
“Safe boundaries that are set by the parent and not negotiated by the child reduce anxiety. Rules and routines such as meal times, bed times, homework, and screen time, which are set and monitored by the parent, create predictability in a child's life. Predictability reduces uncertainty and therefore fear, ”explains author and therapist Krissy Pozatek, MSW. “Parents shouldn't judge a child's self-expression through a child's sense of security. For example, if a child tries to negotiate a later bedtime, this compromises the child's sense of security as it makes the child feel more powerful than the adult. "
An easy way to do this for kids is to set up chores and responsibilities with instructions on when and who to do them.
"It's a really important thing: research shows that children who have assignments build vital life skills. The point is, they learn how to become contributing members of their household and manage the daily self-sufficient life skills that you as an adult need." says author and childcare expert Caroline Maguire, M.Ed. "I believe in this type of citizenship: you are a member of this family unit and we are all helping each other. I am not asking you to do something I would not do myself. When people grow up and become part of a relationship – be be it partner or roommate – you think of others. You don't always take care of yourself. Housework teaches you that. "